5 Ways Your Mental Health Can Get in the Way of Your Orgasm.
What’s more frustrating than losing an orgasm? Not much, really. Except not even coming close to one at all.
Reaching orgasm can feel elusive for many women. Some can’t climax at all. This is normal but it’s worth determining whether there’s something getting in the way of having an orgasm.
Many of the factors that can impact your capability to have an orgasm could be treated with a bit more patience and much more understanding about just how women’s orgasms are linked to the mind.
1 . Anxiety
Stress and anxiety is something many folks have on some level every day. But there will vary levels of stress and anxiety and how they have an effect on each individual is different. For a few women, anxiety could be the real reason for a difficult-to-achieve orgasm.
“Anxiety creates a whole lot of busy thoughts that are distracting from emotions of arousal, ” from Stephanie Buehler, a psychologist and sex therapist. “Sex therapists often speak to those who have ‘performance stress, ’ in which they’re so worried about how exactly good they are as a lover that they can’t get turned on. ”
2 . Unrealistic expectations
The media can change our perception of reality for a lot of things, and believe it or not, orgasming is one of them.
What we see in movies, what we’ve read in older publications, and especially what we see in porn has shaped the way women believe orgasms are supposed to feel, which can lead them to actually missing their own orgasms when they occur.
“[The media] has been guilty of telling women how orgasms are supposed to happen. It made orgasms appear like they had to be an earth-shattering, peel-you-off-the-ceiling experience that occurs in multiples, ” from Lawrence Siegel, scientific psychologist and sex educator.
“So, women will be waiting around in anticipation because of this thunderclap of an orgasm to happen… across the board for all women. But not every woman can have multiple orgasms. Not every woman has even obvious orgasms. In waiting in anticipation, they often miss their own orgasm.
3. Body dysmorphia or body image issues
Body dysmorphia is a psychiatric disorder in which persons become obsessed with a slight body imperfection or see a “flaw” in their minds that isn’t there.
It’s a condition that goes deeper than disliking a particular part of your body for whatever reason. Instead, it’s a fixation that can interfere with how you cope on a day-to- day basis. And with that, it can get in the way of reaching orgasm.
“ Actual distortions of body image and issues related to body image can make a person so self- conscious that they can’t get turned on, ” affirms Buehler.
“ To have an orgasm you have to be able to let go and allow it to happen, which is an issue for a lot of people, ” affirms Siegel. “People wonder if they’re pleasing their partner enough, or they get self-conscious about their own bodies in certain positions. Porn is usually a huge misconception regarding how individuals are ‘supposed’ to appearance, experience, and react during intercourse. And lots of that’s fake. ”
4. PTSD
Post-traumatic stress disorder is normally a serious anxiety disorder that creates a fight-or-flight emotion within a person who’s skilled or witnessed a traumatic event. This may include anything from risk of injury or loss of life, whether that’s from fight, an assault, sexual abuse, physical abuse, or various other trauma.
“ Any kind of trauma could cause problems with any regions of sex, from desire and arousal to orgasm, ” from Sandra Lindholm, a sex therapist and nurse practitioner. “ Just how trauma has an effect on the mind also impacts our sexuality, particularly if the trauma is normally unprocessed. ”
5. Depression and antidepressants
Depression can donate to low libido and orgasm complications, but according to Buehler that is less common, unless, of training course, you’re taking antidepressants.
“ Nearly every antidepressants, except Wellbutrin, makes it difficult to orgasm, ” she says. “ Should this happen, the individual should report the issue back again to the prescribing physician. ”
How do you understand if there’s a physical or mental explanation?
There are many things that can block the way of coming. One common trigger, for instance, could simply be that you had too many drinks, since alcohol numbs the nervous system.
But how do you know if it’s something medical?
Lindholm explains that there are a few medical conditions that can impact the orgasm. The first is conditions that impact circulation or the nervous system. There are also medications that impair arousal and orgasm. Or, it could be a major hormonal shift.
“Anything that affects circulation, such as vascular disease, heart disease, and diabetes, can deaden the orgasm, ” affirms Lindholm. “Antidepressant medications such as Paxil, Zoloft, and Prozac, while perhaps making you feel happy, can block arousal and orgasm as well. ”
So , if none of these reasons apply to you, it may be worth looking into the emotional and mental factors that could be which makes it more difficult to come.
Communication with your partner or a mental health professional can often be the best way to get at the root of why you may be passing up on orgasms.
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